Student Nurse: Becoming an RN

I certainly was determined to get there!

How difficult could this RN stuff be, anyway? I had done my LPN program with no problem.

No problem with the work....but the instructors?

Well, upon reading my diary back then - I had one bad report as a student LPN,  from an RN - that I “didn’t initiate nursing care on own”. 

honestly, she looked
EXACTLY like this

Who could blame me when the old witch (with a capital B) classroom instructor for the LPN course scared the hell out of us by describing in great detail all the ways we could kill our patients???

Then – after freaking us all out to the point of debilitation – I am told I shouldn’t work in a high stress area by my LPN clinical instructor because I didn’t look organized because of my “flyaway hair” that she continually criticized me for.

That was her entire focal point. Since when is that an actual PERFORMANCE problem? Could I help what my hair looked like? The elastic band was no match for the short over permed frizzy and feathered styles of the 1970s -  Farrah Fawcett and all that.

But, after working a couple months as an LPN, I discovered that what my instructors had told me was a bunch of crock – that I thrived in stressful situations and I didn’t kill any patients - and also I discovered that I really enjoyed the work.

On the other hand, I found the LPN instructor was having difficulty working as an RN on the same unit. Eyeopener. Hate to say it, but from my experience...."those who can - do, those who can't......" you know the rest.

Several years of working as an LPN built up confidence in what I was doing and gave me a thirst for even more knowledge – and so I applied to the brand new “access program” for LPNs - the prep program for entrance into the RN program - Second year.

I went to the Registrar of the college to submit my name to write a series of exams that challenged the first year of the RN program.

If you had all your university course prerequisites and passed the challenge exams ....you would then be admitted to the "diploma nurse" program.

After 1 1/2 years solid - with no break – I would graduate with a Nursing Diploma and be eligible to write the RN’s - CNATs exam (then named equivalent of the American NCLEX) – taken over 2 ½ days (as opposed to the 200 question/4 hour CRNE exam now).

Great.

Sounded doable. To me, anyway.

Not so much to the Registrar. “Sorry,” he said. “There is NO WAY you will be able to take all the courses you need to get into the first class in the access program starting next fall.....NO YOU CAN'T. (heard THAT one before~~) - you have too many courses to complete in one year - especially if you have to work too. You will have to wait until the second access year is offered.”

Which might just mean - never.

This was a “trial basis” course and I couldn’t take the chance and wait and maybe not ever get in again.

Disappointed, I went home.

On the way home, I got into an accident - not my fault by the way. I was rear-ended at a stop light by a truck that pushed me halfway through the intersection. (my first rear end accident of 3 for those who have been counting!)

I was to be off work for a month, unable to do heavy lifting. In that month I registered in three different towns, at three different campuses, all the courses I would need for the first year prerequisites: Biology, Sociology, Psychology, Microbiology, Anatomy and Physiology and English.......plus ended up working full time after the month off.

This was the age before computers – so it would be more difficult for the different campuses to detect multiple registrations within the system and I was hoping they wouldn't suspect what I was doing.

It seems they never did because I successfully completed them all - over 2 semesters, which was no small feat given that I had never done any high school Science courses save Biology 11, and only completed a special edition Math 11E for people who found Math 11 too difficult ( I am somewhat dyslexic with numbers.  I have learned to live with it now, but in high school, math was next to impossible).

I finished all with marks good enough to be admitted to the first Access Nurse Program.

I went back to the Registrar of the College and presented him with my transcript. "Now can I get into that RN course?" Staring at the paperwork in front of him he stated, " You ARE determined, aren't you?" He had no idea.

Yes - I replied firmly - I certainly AM.

"Ok. I guess we can’t stop you." I was accepted on a “mature student” status.

Great. I went home. Put in my resignation at the hospital. Thank goodness I had 2 roommates to help me pay my mortgage at the time......a mortgage whose rate would scoot up to 24% just before I finished my diploma.

So I held my breath and did the 1 1/2 years of classes and clinicals, no break.

One of the instructors of this course, a middle eastern male, was known to give better marks to the "better looking" girls in the class and the ones with the tighter pants with the vertical smiles. Another instructor was known to give "A"s to ALL her class members despite any less than stellar performance. I was unlucky enough to get the former.

Once again the instructors would prove to be the biggest challenge.

I was told by my instructor, during the first week after clinicals - "You did A level work, but I never give out "A"s in first classes...."

WHAT???

This didn't make sense to me. VERY discouraging to work so hard but not get the credit. So, I work my butt off and do top notch work..... and only get a B???

That was the stupidest thing I had ever heard of.

After that I really didn't try very hard to get good marks. What was the point?   Why bother?

I wasn't going to get what I deserved anyway, no matter how much I tried. The girls in the other instructor's class got A's no matter how badly they did.

There was just no sense to it at all. I lost all respect of the educational system in that college.

I later found out that a distant relative was in my same instructor's class, and SHE ended up quitting because of sexual harassment – she wouldn’t “work” for her marks, if you know what I mean, so he made it impossible for her to continue. She quit and changed schools ending up graduating with honors from the RPN (Psychiatric Nurse) program.

I got sick with Strep throat during my OB rotation. I was so sick I was actually comatose for 3 days....3 days  I couldn't remember – didn’t eat and didn’t drink anything.

When I finally did come to - I had no idea what time of the day or night it was or even what day it was.

I had missed three days of Clinical OB. I wondered why I didn’t get a phone call from anyone.

Apparently the nurses just thought I had not shown up and no one – not even my instructors followed up. I could have died.

Years later, I told this story to a clinical instructor when a student nurse didn’t show up. She wasn’t going to call her.....until  I told her my story.

I can remember needing to go to work for a shift at the hospital one hour away on the day I had to sign up for another particular class. I was still working the occasional shift to pay for my 24% mortage rate and I had to leave enough  time to get to work as scheduled.

An instructor with Insecurity Issues was manning the table.

After apologizing to my fellow students, I went to the front of the line and explained politely that I really needed to leave now in order to get to the hospital on time to work my shift - is it possible to put my name in and run??

Seemed like a reasonable request to me.

In my "real life hospital experience" this was usually a request that no one would question. It wasn't like I was a trying to play hooky – or asking for a special treatment to leave for no good reason.

I had a responsibility to attend to. A real live hospital job.

What I heard from that instructor was - "SO? Get to the back of the line......it isn't my problem..." (same instructor I worked with later that couldn’t cope with ward nursing)

Not very sympathetic.

Not very flexible.

I was never so glad to get through that year and a half. All those silly "care plans" that didn't get followed, that were impractical and no "real nurse" could decipher or have the time to follow.

Contrary to my request to stay in the College Town for my practicum, I was placed in the same hospital I worked as an LPN. 

Although there was an advantage to working in a hospital where I knew and had worked with almost every RN...sometimes there were drawbacks.

Why was it when all the other students got one or two patients.... I was getting dumped on with 6 and 8 patients????   It didn't really bother me...it was fairly easy for me since organization was my middle name after working as an LPN.

I just wanted to know why I wasn't being given the same treatment as everyone else in my class.

The day I was awarded my diploma.....I was hired by the same hospital that I had worked as an LPN and was allowed to work as a “Grad Nurse” until I could write my CNATS and Register in my province.

The nurses I worked with were wonderful. I was never so happy to leave college behind.

Reality of floor nursing was infinitely better than school or training.  I found everyone very supportive and helpful in my new role as an RN on the Surgical Unit.

The biggest adjustment was that greater feeling of responsibility between LPN and RN. Apart from that ..... all went smoothly as I was thrown into the machinations of the General Surgical Ward.

I don’t believe I even got an orientation since I had worked there as a student in my last clinical.

There were no programs for New Grads. You just got out there and worked.

I was -  however -  to have nightmares about unfinished course papers and exams for the next 30 years.