Showing posts with label 1970s. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 1970s. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Sisterhood of Nurses

Had a delightful visit with old nursing friends from 30 - 35 years ago.    Hadn't seen either of them for at least 25 - 30  years.

It's amazing the things we talked about, everything from families to old nursing instructors to people we know - or used to know.   Can you believe we even remembered names of patients we looked after in the extended care unit when we first started nursing - 37 years ago? 

The visit was just an overnighter - a quick drive up and then back again to the home city.  But it did me a world of good.  There is just something about the Sisterhood of Nurses that is so different from any other friendships or family relationships.

I do have to admit, that in the morning, before they left, although I got out the loaf of bread and toaster, I was so caught up in the conversation that I forgot about breakfast.

I am sure they were ravenous and were just too polite to say - Hey, let's eat! - and they left with nary a bite!

I just haven't had an appetite lately with all the "stuff" going on, and I have lost about 10lbs in the last month.

At the best of times I have been known to forget to eat.

Moral of the story:  If you come to visit me,  remind me that we have to eat.  If you don't, you just may starve to death.

Hope you gals stopped for breakfast somewhere.

I am appalled at my lack of hospitality!

And I miss them already.
Peaches, a frog, wine, blackberry jam and antipasto - Thanks you two!








Saturday, December 18, 2010

Stars fall from Heaven sometimes........

Picture the late 1970s.

I was a brand new nurse, sending out approximately 250 Christmas cards every year.  Through the years my Christmas Card List grew expotentially - cousins that move out and start their own family, new friends and acquaintances with each move made -  and it was starting to get out of hand.

I would spend enormous amounts on cards and stamps - and hours of time to write more than just a signature on each card.   I figured -  if you were going to send a card, one might as well personalize it with a newsy note at the very least.   As well, the post office didn't give any breaks on stamps, so I thought - might as well send a short letter.

Nowadays my Christmas card list is very small. I only send a paper card to those who don't have email.  To the rest - my account with Blue Mountain dot com does just fine and covers all bases for less than $12 per year.....never mind being more green.

Most card messages are fairly standard - the usual "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year" - and perhaps a simple little verse.  Very forgettable. 

Back in the 1970s, the choices were a fraction of what we have today. I spent hours trying to find the perfect card....

Then - I found that card that made a lasting impression on me.  I copied out the verse into my Bible and for years I would send out my Holiday cards, handwriting this same quote in each, along with my usual note.

The verse?

Hold fast to stars,
Hold fast to the Elusive, the Intangible,
The never-to-be-had.
For stars fall from heaven sometimes,
And kings are born in barns,
And Miracles rise out of the Little Things.


Today, you can find it online by googling, but none give reference to the author and they are all in very recent publications.  I speculate at how each of those people found that same verse.  Was it passed along from my own cards? Or - did someone else do the same as I  -  copy the verse from their own card because it meant so much to them?  In my original Christmas card from the 1970s, there were no credits.  It was just a verse someone had composed for the card company, I would venture to guess. (let me know if any one of you out there finds otherwise!)

The excerpt meant a lot to me back then -  realizing that my dreams, and the seemingly impossible, was possible. 

That there was Someone out there who cared for me and was taking care of every little thing in my life, even when I made bad choices or when bad things found me.

That sometimes,  when you wish and hope - that those things we wish and hope for are nowhere near the splendor and greatness we actually are eventually handed.

Every Christmas, when I dragged out that verse, it was a reminder - to me - of the Hope we have in this world.  A reminder to reach farther and higher.

After all, greatness is only achieved when you strive for that which seems beyond our grasp.

Christmas Centerpiece at my cousin's house - cranberries and white roses

Monday, October 4, 2010

ohhhh....another year, another day.......

Does this ever take me back.

One of the songs I sang on the beach...with my guitar....feet dug into the sand....breeze through my long blonde hair - parted in the middle as we did in those days.....psychadelic printed shirt.......boyfriend at the time driving up from Oregon in his little VW beetle........."the smell of maple leaves in fall"....

Sunday, September 19, 2010

You never Know how your Words will touch others.....

While on the subject of books.....I have a personal story about a friend of mine that I had first met when quite young - and then again in my early 20s. 

I wish I could say that he inspired me to go into nursing...but actually, he inspired me to be a better person, and look outside myself and to those around me who are suffering....which in turn made me a better nurse.

family photo
Back in the 1960s, I met a boy - my age -  staying at our campsite.   Paul was a skinny kid and their family seemed to be as normal as any family ..... but then what did I know?  I was only 13 or so at the time.   They stayed at our place in the summer when his parents brought them all home to Canada on "furlough" from the mission field.

My sis ran into him at a Northern wilderness camp and they spent many hours in discussion around the campfire.

So it was a delightful reunion when my sis and I ran into him again at College in my sophomore year.

 We became good friends as the semester went on and kept in touch after I quit College midway through the year.  

Through the next few years,  as I went through a couple of relationships, he became an advisor of sorts. 

He was a serious guy - but a with a quick witted sense of humor.  He always seemed a little bit "preoccupied" to me,  but I could always count on him for great advice.   

Paul as I knew him in College
One summer he popped by the house to visit - the summer before I went into nursing. 

My mother thought for sure he came to ask me out....but in my mind, and I am pretty certain his.....we were only friends.    I admired him but I did  make note in my diary that he was "too busy" with "no time for serious girlfriends".

I also documented that I felt "very privileged to be so close to him" as a friend.  

It was his letter to me after I quit college and just before I went into nursing that emphasized my need  to look beyond myself in order to help other people. 

Although I am not a "religious" person per say, ie: I don't go to church -  I do have a "spiritual" side of me that is very personal.

Here is his letter to me - in all it's unedited imperfect beauty - exactly how he wrote it.   We were both age 20 at the time :

Dear [RetiredN]:


Hi my beautiful mixed-up friend.  Do me a favor?


  Take a look and for a while just concentrate on how big God is.  In some areas of life, things are relative.  The size of problems are relative to one's overview.  The same problem which is big when compared to our finiteness is small when placed besides a big God.  The bigger the God is the smaller the problem.  How big is your God?


Is he really omnipotent like we often glibly say that he is or is my situation (just this one time of course) just a little to big for him, and he has kind of lost control?


Is he love, meaning that he works out of a framework of love.  If he is love he can't relate to you on any other basis than love in it's purest highest form, love not dependent on your ability or action.


Omniscient? Immutable? Limited to 4 walls of mundane existent?


Live one day at a time, not walking backwards down life's trail and not living in the "someday" of the future when circumstances will be changed.


Honey, you keep looking at your mixed up insides, how will you ever see anyone else in need.

Look up, Look around
And Live
Goodnight,

Paul


I have to admit, when I read his letter I shed a few tears.

It is true that  when one is younger - sometimes we are so wrapped up in ourselves, we don't always see the big picture -  and miss what is really important.

As my diary said  "his letter really made me think...he said a lot of important things that needed to be said.  I really appreciate him."

Paul's Book
Through the years, I lost track of him, until one day a couple years ago, I found him on Facebook  and  discovered that he wrote a book - a book that he never expected would go further than his family and a few friends - and now has become a runaway best seller and is translated into 40 different languages and dialects. 

 I can't say one way or the other what I think of it.   It doesn't really matter what I think.  

It touches people's lives and it definitely creates discussion inside and outside religious circles.


Thirty-four years ago, Paul's words made a big difference in my life.  Who would ever have known that 30 years later, his words would make a difference in millions of lives? 

I will always be thankful for that friend of mine who took the time to write me a letter and set me on the right path just when I needed it.  :)    





Sunday, September 12, 2010

OMG: I have been a nurse in 5 decades!

Holy cow.  Or as my uncle (may he rest in peace) -  always said "Holy Mackerel!"

I can't believe that!  When did I get this old?  Where did the time go? WTFlip????

It was just yesterday that the first blush of nursing took hold of me.....and I was afraid of killing patients.  Now I just want to get through the day without killing myself.   Funny how the old body just decides to turn on me.  I used to run relays and was the Interior Provincial Javelin throwing champion. I hiked up mountains, biked where I wanted to go and walked miles and miles.....

It could be worse. At least I have all my faculties about me.  The neurons are synapsing in an orderly fashion - for me, anyway.

I was just having this convo with my Nurse Cousin from Texas.....

When I was a young thing, I used to wonder how the old people I looked after couldn't see all those hairs growing off their nose or out their nostrils or ears,  the extra huge eyebrows that were never plucked and wondered how they didn't know there were growths coming out of their face......you know, all that grooming that needs to be kept up with.....

And now, with the help of my 25X mirror.....I *know* why......

They couldn't see anything up close.  Glasses can only do so much.  When it comes right down to it....ya really need a 25X mirror to see everything .....

And..... Holy Mackerel.  FIVE DECADES...............

Where's that glass of wine.......???????

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

YEARS of NURSING...

I was going through some old drawers and boxes today....and found this stack of date books.
They basically represents my career as an RN. I think I am only missing one year...and that is because it was on an *actual* BIG calendar, as opposed to a diary-book calendar. Count them. 19. Most are 2 year calendars and some are one year calendars.

I can thumb through them and see where I was on whatever day for the last 30 years. Amazing isn't it?
That all those years boil down to 19 books. Oh. And that doesn't include this years book. That is 5 decades! =^@

What it doesn't show is all those years of caring for people...hours spent worrying about their well being - miles of running up and down hallways, countless medications given out, numerous IV's hung, over 6,000 babies delivered, a billion MD orders - well - everything an RN does in a day. Or a night.

Some years were better than others. Some were washes. But I can say, I did learn a lot and did a lot in all those years. Geriatrics, Rehab, Medical, Surgical, Store Nurse, L&D, Gyne, Nursery, Psychiatry, Telemetry, Camp RN, Travel Nursing, Prison Nursing, Triage RN,Float RN, Board of director for Non-profit Seniors Assisted Living... all that packed into 19 little date books. Or 30 some odd years- whichever way you want to look at it.

I don't know why I keep them. Maybe because they are like a diary of what the biggest part of my life was....or is. I probably spent more Christmases and more holidays and more birthdays and more special times with colleagues and patients than with my own family. There are little notes here and there of things I did....travelling backpacking in Europe. Twice. A dozen or so odd trips to Hawaii. More than that to Mexico. More moves than I can count - approximately Seventeen? - within 2 different countries, with 7 homes purchased and 7 Canadian and 5 American hospitals worked in.

I Lost count long ago - of the boyfriends I dated and the friends I left behind and the roommates that moved on. But even though they are a record of the past....it's the present that means more to me.

So - was it all worth it? I think so. Although I had my misgivings many times over the years, what I chose as a career (although I didn't really ever consider it a career since it was supposed to only be temporary) made me who I am today - and I quite like where I am at the moment.

But given the opportunity to leave it for good - would I? You bet. But, for now, it is difficult to let go of what has been a major part of one's life.

And so I hang on to that dusty little pile of elastic-bound date books. And every once in a while.....I flip through them and smile........

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Breathe In, Breathe Out...

I looked after a young man years ago. He was a handsome guy, early 20s. Lots of fun. Very talented. All the nurses knew him from his many admissions and absolutely adored him. He was that type of patient you never minded taking care of. I can still picture him sitting cross-legged on his bed as he struggled to breathe.

One day, he was admitted to the hospital and he didn't get better. His death touched all of us. I think it was my first time experiencing the death of someone my own age. It made an impression on me - I still remember his name.

Last year, I read about a young girl in my own town, close to the same age as the young man that passed away 30 years ago and I thought of him again. You see, they had something in common.

Cystic Fibrosis.

Eva Markvoort was only 25 when Cystic Fibrosis ended her life prematurely. She tried desperately to live. She had a double lung transplant which her body rejected. She did everything she could to fight the Disease until trying wasn't enough anymore. I had been following her blog every once in a while the year before she died - and watched her videos. She was an amazing young woman. One of her dreams was to make a movie documentary . And she did.

The title? "65_Redroses". Interesting name.

Cystic Fibrosis strikes early. Early enough that very young children are affected. When children so young have an illness that is difficult to pronounce, sometimes the words get twisted. Cystic Fibrosis often comes out as "Sixty-five Roses". Eva threw in the "Red" because that was her favorite color.

Even though it was expected, it was a shock to read that Eva had finally died. When you follow someone's blog, somehow they become part of your life, and if they reveal enough about themselves, it is like they are one of your circle of friends. I wasn't quite ready for it.

In a way, Eva still lives on........


* Average Age of Survival through the years:
1950 - Age 1
1960 - Age 10
1970 - Age 16
1980 - Age 18
1990 - Age 29
2000 - Age 32
2004 - Age 35.1
2006 - Age 36.9
2007 - Age 37.4 (but only 50% will reach this age)

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Retrospection

It is quite interesting when one becomes the caregiver of one's parents.   Not just the reversal of roles physically speaking - but often in the emotional areas too.


My dad and laundry, my leg at ther arrow
I was explaining to my mother while ironing dad's shirts, how much I hate ironing. My husband does all the necessary ironing in our house. A well pressed shirt is a thing of beauty to him.


Daily ironing of hundreds of pillowslips - among other chores - at our Family Resort, wrested any passion for ironing from me. We were kept cleaning units, doing the laundry, changing towels, cleaning campground washrooms, serving in the restaurant, preparing tables and doing dishes, etc - from sun up to sundown.
My mother replied - Well when I was 13 your Grandma sent all of us (there were 7 of them) out to work - I ironed all the shirts and did the cleaning at Mr and Mrs DeWitts' - and she kept all the money......we didn't get any of it. A titch of bitterness.

It took me a few more passes with the iron to think that one through.

Gently. Mom, how is that different from the work us girls had to do at the Resort, working from sun up to sundown and not getting paid at all? I was amused at the incongruity - It's not ok when it is done to you by your mother, but ok to do it to it when you are the mother.

I don't harbor any regrets or resentments about the way I grew up because if I hadn't worked as hard as I did, and had the experiences I did - I wouldn't have the work ethic I had, and I would not have appreciated Nursing quite as much.

As an LPN I can remember doing six 8 hour shifts in a row/two off and thinking.....oh, is that all? Only 8 hours of work? and I actually get days off and get to do what I want and meet with friends and have fun? AND - I actually get paid PLUS vacation time as well? I was thrilled. Nursing was a snap compared with working for one's own parents.

There are lots of things to appreciate about nursing. It gives you a different perspective on the life around you. You find yourself bossing around people 3 times your age - and they listen to you. Well, most of the time. You find yourself giving advice to friends and neighbors when requested - and they appreciate and give deference to your opinion. Nursing is still one of those respected professions, even though sometimes it may not seem like it in the micro workings of each day on a hospital unit.

People do trust you more than your average Joe. I have had very personal conversations with people in the community - people I hardly know - just because they discover I am a nurse. They reveal the most intimate details - invited or not. They have wanted to show me body parts and scars they would never have revealed otherwise in public. They talk to me about bowel movements, malfunctioning body parts and injuries - because I am a nurse. Last year as I was waiting for a follow-up visit in ER as a patient, a young mother handed me her sick baby to hold while she went to the restroom. You have to wonder sometimes at this blind confidence.

Most of all, at the risk of sounding schmaltzy, I would not have had the self respect and satisfaction with my life, knowing that I have made life a little better for those in my charge. At this point, I do believe I have contributed more than taken away in this world - in a small way - nothing worth headlines - but it makes me feel content - that I have done my best.

My Mother once told me that she wished she had gone into nursing - and that she always wanted to be a Nurse. This surprised me. She always worked hard - and didn't have it easy in the early days. But I know she is proud of what I chose as my profession....and somehow lives a little vicariously through some of the tidbits I throw her way (FOIPA- the US version of HIPAA - taken into consideration).

I hope my Mom finds some peace with her choices in life, as I have with mine.

Posted by Cartoon Characters at 10:04 AM 2 comments  (couldn’t retrieve  :(  )



Sunday, April 25, 2010

Medical Unit: The Good, Bad and the Ugly

My next Job as an LPN was on a Medical floor. There were 3 arms to the unit....each arm had at least 20 patients. Each arm had ONE RN and ONE LPN. It was the RN's job to give out the meds (poor things-because on a Med floor that means MILLIONS of them- and basically, that's all they did all day!) monitor IVs (all glass bottles -no bags!) and do the treatments. It was our job as an LPN to do everything else - bathe all the patients that needed bathing (which meant most), toilet everyone, answer call bells, change sheets every other day, make beds and turn any patient that required it, take vital signs, mobilize and generally do all the direct patient care as needed.

LPNs started at 7 am and we didn't get any verbal report....just a list of patients and quickly scan the Kardex for activity, I&O's and vital signs that needed doing - and off we went - 10 minutes max - or else! The RNs came on at 8 am (I was envious of that extra hour of sleep!) and then sat through report which at that time meant ALL 3 WINGS worth. Of course by the time they got out of report an hour or two later, it was almost 10 am and most of the physical work was done by the LPNs.

It was a tough go, mostly because of sheer numbers, but generally, the patients were *fairly* stable, and even though you had 20 some odd patients to look after, the acuity level was a lot lower than a medical unit nowadays. Patients stayed in hospital a lot longer so were less sick than your average medical patient today. Charting was only one page of nurses' notes and a graph sheet and a couple lab pages - no signatory, no multiple signatures or daily MARs- just one page for meds and MD notes.

Definitely fewer machines and computers- but then the rooms were too small anyway – and I don’t recall doing even one O2 sat on the ward. I can remember only one patient for whom they brought over a Pulse Oxymeter from ICU ...and it was a HUGE box. There was only the very rare IV pump. Heparin was by volutrol drip only and TPN drips were freeflow-no pump.

Thermometers were the glass-and-mercury ones for under the tongue (it took f.o.r.e.v.e.r to do temps!) - and they sat in an antiseptic solution at each bedside. We had time on days and evenings to give out ice water (which LPNs did all together along with the vital sign taking!) and there was time to give everyone a back rub (mobile or not!) at bedtime, or get them tea or whatever they needed. It was busy, but not a harried-nothing-is-ever-getting-done-oh-crap-someone-is-going-to-die type of busy like today.

We had orderlies to help with the heavy patients and care for the male catheters if we didn't have time. They were a fun bunch of guys. We had a great time, joking around, laughing, helping each other out, and I even ended up dating one or two for a while. :P

The only time I was ever involved in a full blown CPR as an LPN was on the 3rd wing of the Medical Unit. I had finished my rounds, and came back to the first room where an elderly gentleman was waiting for discharge. He was the first on my rounds. I had taken his vital signs, chatted with him about going home and then asked when his wife was coming to pick him up. I had told him to get himself ready and I would come back after I peeked in on everyone else and help him out with getting his things together. When I walked back into the room not 20 minutes later, there he was keeled over on the bed. I called the code and then set in motion the things we were supposed to do to begin CPR.

This next part is going to gross out any new RNs. Back then (now I am starting to sound like a dinosaur if I haven't already!) there were no airways or masks in the patient's rooms to use for mouth breathing. You just did the mouth to mouth directly on the patient....no gloves, no protection, no nothing. Gloves were only the sterile kind and were never used for patient care no matter what you were doing.

No electric beds - I had to hand roll with the crank at the foot of the bed so it was flat and elevated for CPR. There was only one ambu bag and it was on the crash cart in some cubby hole down the hall. Eventually someone would haul it to the scene. My RN was first to arrive. She made the BIG mistake of asking me which end I wanted to take (head or chest) and of course I picked chest compressions......for obvious reasons. I knew exactly what was coming. Three rounds of compressions into the CPR, the patient vomits - right into the RN's mouth. Whoa. So glad I made the right choice.

Once the crash cart arrived - along with the orderly, the ICU/CCU Code team and the Charge nurse and Supervisor - I stepped back to let the crowd do their thing. No one needed this body in there and besides, I had 19 other patients to sort out still. Suffice it to say, that poor gentleman went Home - just not to the "home" he thought he would be going to. The docs said it was a blown AAA.

Speaking of which. I remember doing the "rounds" one night, doing the turns, changing the beds, answering call lights - generally making sure everyone was breathing. Routinely, we would start in the 1st wing, at the four bed rooms and work our way around to the end of the hall and back. Approximately half way through the round a bell call light came on from the first room. I walked back to find out what was the problem. Everyone had been fine 30 minutes ago. Three of the four had been asleep, and the third, a (DNR) stroke patient, we turned and propped with pillows.

The call bell was from the 3rd patient kitty corner to the stroke patient. "Yes, can I help you?" I asked. "That patient over there" he pointed to the stroke patient, "is dead." "What?" I was perplexed. It wasn’t like he could have gotten up out of bed on his own and checked.
" Yes, he is gone" the gentleman continued. " I saw an angel come and stand at the foot of his bed and he took that guy by the hand and left..." No way, I thought. I went to the stroke patient's bed. Sure enough. He was gone.

That was a story I have told over and over again. Angels - right on our unit.



Working on a Medical unit, we had lots of Cardiac patients. They were my "pet" patients.....being a young thing and all, and not realizing what men REALLY thought back then, I catered to them to no end. I would make sure they were all given fresh linens, fresh water, bedtime back rubs......I just loved taking care of them....they seemed to really appreciate (no wonder!) the attention and showed gratitude for everything done for them....compared to the elderly females who would basically complain about everything! The "elderly" men I looked after back then were approximately my age now. I can't believe I thought they were "old"!! But, back then, what did I know?



Most MDs were a real pain. I felt sorry for the RNs because the Internists would come on their rounds at any old time and leave pages and pages of orders (mostly STAT) and then walk off without telling anyone. One or two were civilized but it always seems there is at least ONE that is so totally Dr. Obnoxious.

I can remember looking after one of his patients (one of 20-some!) with an RN that didn't take any guff from anyone. His “special” patient was in one of the three private rooms. In the middle of the night we had to transfer his patient out of that room and into a ward because we needed that room for a dying (DNR) patient and her family. By morning, the dear soul had passed and after the family had said their goodbyes, we were left dealing with the body.

The custom of the unit was, if it was close to morning, rather than call the family MD from home, we were to get the first doc to show up on the unit to pronounce the patient. Unfortunately for him, but mostly for us, it was Dr. Obnoxious that first arrived on the scene that am . My RN informed this doc of the expired patient that he was to pronounce. "I will NOT" he stated emphatically "Get someone else". He grabbed his chart and headed down the wing on his way to the private room where he last saw his patient, my RN on his heels, saying nothing about moving his patient. He walked into the room and pulled back the covers of the poor departed soul.

"WHAT!"he exclaimed, shocked. "But - she's - DEAD!". The spunky RN passed him the chart for the deceased patient. "Thank you, that's all we wanted to know - now please sign these". She was definitely my hero.

Generally the medical unit back then was a good place to work. Very busy despite the lack of computerization. Sometimes chaotic. But the camaraderie and friendships more than made up for any difficulties encountered. The one thing that I really liked was the independence that work brought me. I was making $8 per hour, which I thought a lot back then. At least it was better than minimum wage which was approximately $1.75 per hour. I bought my first 2 bedroom apartment at age 21 for nothing down, $200 per month for $20K, then sold it, making $10K and with that bought a 3 bedroom townhouse right near the lake for $46K.
I always rented to friends from work and we always had a great time – at work and otherwise. Not once did I ever think that one day I would be a nurse in my mid-50s, looking back on the past, shaking my head and wondering at the life of a young nurse - taking life for granted.......

I stayed on that unit for two years, then decided enough was enough. I needed to go for my RN so I could sleep in that extra hour. No lie. That was my reasoning at the time. =^@

Like I said.....I look back and shake my head.........

Friday, April 23, 2010

Extended Care LPN

My first job as an LPN was working in extended care. I was, what...22?

It was the only job I could get at the hospital I did my training in. The old folks there mostly didn't do much anymore - save the bingo games or the “art” classes, some OT - but there were sure a lot there that had lived a full life. I could tell by the photos and the stories....and opinions.

I still can picture in my mind's eye- that little old lady with the thick brogue accent who told me the amazing story of how she immigrated to Canada with her Canadian Soldier husband after falling in love (apparently after turning down the proposal of Prince of Wales -later King Edward that abdicated for Wallis Simpson) and moved to the Great White North.

She told me (during her morning bath) that she had, at that point, no idea where babies came from and when she started getting morning sickness...she had NO IDEA she was pregnant – all she knew was that she was terribly sick and in the middle of nowhere.

She walked miles to get the help of her neighbour who recognized her symptoms immediately and had to break the news to her – “you’re going to have a baby!” I admired her fortitude - coming to a foreign land – not knowing anyone and then enduring all the hardships of living in Northern B.C.! Such a positive lady and - so happy. The stroke that confined her to her wheelchair didn't seem to dampen her interest in life and those around her.

In contrast, there was the sad old woman that reported different nurses for "not cleaning the bedpan out good enough" and verbally chastised me for singing while working - "Don't you know there are sick people here??" - nothing good to say, everything was awful and nothing anyone could do could please her. She couldn’t help with the wheelchair transfer in the least (many nurses hurt their backs on her – yet she was seen, on a pass to her old home, wandering about on her own) and made life miserable for everyone about her.

What a difference in attitude! By the way, I can talk about these 2 old ladies because
A. They are long dead and gone.
B. I have no clue what their names are.
C. I would guess their relatives don't remember their names either - 35 years after the fact. They were already really old back then.

How sad...to have lived and no one remembers you existed. The only thing worse is no one remembering you existed while you are alive.

Looking back on those days: all those 8 hour night shifts just making the rounds, turning every “resident” every 2 hours, changing and turning, wiping and draining catheters - then the day shift - one person transfers, taking down to dinner, making sure everyone was fed......what really stands out in my mind is all the fun we had.

I can remember phoning the local radio station to have the DJ make an announcement over the night time radio for the nurses on Night Duty to "wake up and do your rounds". The camaraderie was unique and fun. Fun, not just with the other nurses and staff.....but with all those "old people".... they really made an impression on me and I did care about each one.

Every single one of them had once been someone’s precious little girl or boy, growing up with brothers and sisters - experiencing the first day of school and growing up with their families, going to college or getting that first job, meeting the love of their lives (or not!) and having babies of their own - watching them grow up and leave the nest.....and gradually getting older.....and older.

It was so interesting hearing all the stories...all these "broken bodies" that once had a vibrant life, were young once and had – and still have - feelings.....and probably still felt no older than 18 inside their earthly body. They were once somebody's baby, somebody's lover, somebody's mommy and now somebody's Grammy.



I would always pause at the bulletin board by the head of their bed and look at all their yellowed and dog-eared photos their family posted ...a young man smiling - arm around a beautiful woman looking vaguely like the person in the bed.....a fragile sepia square with cracks criss-crossing the photo of a little family.... and you realise that these precious Old Ones went through life....just as we all are....experiencing life, love, laughter, sadness, tears ....dreams now part of that past - and now confined to an ECU....some with visitors, some not so many and some - none at all.

As a younger person I had no concept or thought that at that at some point I, too, would travel down that same road......and I felt a tug in my heart for those beautiful vibrant young people from years ago frozen in time on those old photos that were now, by life's circumstances, transformed into the withered figure in the bed..... and wonder at the change in fortunes that life dealt them....

Nursing in the ECU was the start of a real human experience for me. It brought into perspective not only the art of caring for people....not just physically but also as human beings - living souls.
I really did love every minute of it. But, after ten months – I wanted a change.

I wanted to know and learn more.

I transferred to Medical.

In my diary, my actual entry reads "Got the posting on Medical!! YIPEEEE!!!!"

Saturday, April 10, 2010

The Beginning....Student Nurse LPN

When I graduated from Nursing - if someone had told me I would still be working as a nurse 34 years later....I would NEVER have believed them.

Uh-uh.

It was something I was going to do "just for now" so I could make some money - then go back to school and do what I REALLY wanted to do. Art. Music. Clothing Design. Interior Design. Anything Creative.

Nothing Nursing.

Nursing was going to be a temporary job that would allow me the flexibility and the funds to train for a career that allowed me to be creative – which did not include Nursing.

Already I had played in a band, wrote music, designed clothing from scratch, decorated houses - nothing that even closely resembled nursing.

Nursing: not the occupation one would REALLY want to get into. Not if you knew anything of what it was all about in advance.... the things one would have to do in the line of duty....and how *little* one would get paid for so much aggravation.

When you first go into nursing you think more about the Respect and Glamour of the job - you know - the *Super Hero* part of nursing.

Who thinks about the reality of it? - cleaning up people that crap themselves - head to toe poop, under the fingernails, EVERYWHERE - between the sheets and smeared all over the wall?

Who ever thinks about geezers handing over their dentures with a string of gooey mucus and metamucil that stretches from mouth to dentures - into the palm of your hand?

Who would ever think that you would have to deal with 300 pound bedridden human beings that you are expected to roll over - single handedly - and change every two hours?

Or dealing with vomiting blood or exsanguinating human beings. Or worse yet - think of all the diseases you could possibly contract. Who deals with this stuff in real life?

And who really wants a job that takes you away from family and friends right when the fun is starting or miss all the special events like Birthdays, Christmases, Family Reunions, Thanksgiving, New Years, Relatives visits from Other Countries - and -  instead of having fun - you have a work load that is impossible, patients and visitors that are complaining and doctors that are downright mean and rude to you????

I had been a patient twice before I did my training.

Had a Bilateral Bunionectomy done at age 19. You would think SOMEONE would have warned me??? I didn’t see anything then of what I experienced later as a nurse – although - I have to say - I was put in a 5th bed in the middle of a 4 bed room with very little privacy. (Little did I realize that that would still be a bone of contention 35 years later.)

Why did I EVER get into this occupation?

That thought has crossed my mind MORE than once over my nursing career that has spanned the last 5 decades. 

One would have thought that I would have clued in immediately the day I stepped inside the hospital for my first clinical. I was petrified to roll the head of the patient's bed up or down for fear I would kill them. Our instructor had scared us to death about *what not to do*.

Or, perhaps on my first practical nursing exam when I answered the question "what things can you do as a nurse to ensure your patient's safety?" and I couldn’t think of anything but "melt the sharp edges off the ice cubes" (hahaha that makes me laugh every time! Clueless).

AND - I should have had a premonition when the nasty old nurse Instructor wouldn't let me off early to be in my own brother's wedding party because apparently - "you won't be able to get the time off once you are working as a nurse!!" - and was threatened by the crotchety old Instructor that my $100 per month much-needed-measly-stipend would be withheld if I DID take even an hour off.

Nothing like running last minute to get dressed in the church parking lot - makeup and hair askew........ Flip I hate those wedding pictures - to this day I curse that nursing instructor.

Yes.

Nursing.

Why would I or anyone want to get into it? Even better question, HOW did I get into it??? I was so naive.

Once I actually started nursing I could see a lot of the positives. There was the companionship of my colleagues – they felt like family back then.

Great camaraderie.

Great for going out when I was younger AND – best of all - there was a *paycheck* ! I could now afford my own apartment. I even bought my first house on my own at age 20. I could come and go as I pleased and didn’t have to work under the thumb and microscope of my folks.

Freedom.

I could work 8 hrs per day rather than the 24 hours per day that I was doing at my parent’s Resort......and the pay was a little better than the waitressing I had been doing at that family restaurant on Main Street. (although shortly thereafter I realized my best friend was making MORE than me working 4 hours waitressing to my 12 hours of nursing )


I started out as an LPN.......and when I wanted to go back to school to take my RN.....my boyfriend at the time said that I couldn't handle it and that I was too stupid.

THAT really made me determined to go back and get my RN....if only to prove him wrong.

But - I still wasn't sure that it was something I really wanted to do.

I wasn't sure I even LIKED nursing.

But - I thirsted for knowledge. To me - Knowledge was everything. There is something amazing about coming to work every day and being challenged with something new.

I wanted to know the whys and the hows and the ins and outs of medicine.

I punted the boyfriend and chose Nursing instead.

No looking back.

punting boyfriend
I was going to be an RN.


BUT....it would only be for a while......at least I THOUGHT......